What is there to say? Last time I did an update was on May 27th and figured this morning it was time to toss off SOMETHING here and I sit here, the cursor blinks and my brain is almost blank…
We’re over halfway through 2020 and it goes without saying that 2020 is a shitshow that should be aborted at the earliest opportunity. So much lies in ruins. A year devoid of arts, culture and JOY. And for those of you who want to say “Ah, but there’s ZOOM and plenty going on there!” I say “Zoom SUCKS”. For instance, choirs singing via Zoom. Like, what is the bloody POINT? The whole POINT of a choir is the gathering of REAL people in REAL time, being able to interact and listen to them… NOT singing isolated at home where it’s impossible to sing in tune, pitch your singing… I bet they sound bloody AWFUL. So, no. No choirs for me, and certainly no meetings – my deafness and reliance on lip reading puts paid to that… all VERY alienating, not that anyone could give a toss how it all affects ME. Had to learn that lesson in my earliest schooldays.
I am finding it very VERY hard keeping a dignified silence. Problem is, everything that’s going on boils down to POLITICS and RELIGION. They are two thorny topics I learned many years ago which are not at all worthy of speaking out about because of conflict, differences of opinion etc. I know for a fact if I expressed some of my thoughts on the misery that’s droning on and on, I would piss off a fair proportion of people I know. It’s getting harder reading THEIR thoughts and beliefs on things that clash badly with my own thoughts and feelings. Many times I feel like SCREAMING at them… I’ve ended up having to block, unfollow or mute a lot of people over the last three months for a variety of reasons, mainly to try and hang on to my sanity.
Still, my silence remains… as does my creative stagnancy. Yes, Blackpool is getting “lively” again so plenty of people about who I could document as I like to do but the Nikon remains in its case, sat dormant since February. I can’t take any photos until masks and “distancing” are banished. I have my reasons, some of them moralistic and… we’ll leave it at that.
There are a thousand things I could prattle on about here and hey, after all this is MY space on MY website yet I don’t feel “free” at all to say what I want to say. Know what I mean? The world is unrecognisable. I do NOT like what is happening and what is brewing. Barely anything makes any logical sense such as theatres being allowed to reopen BUT shows are forbidden? What PLANET is my Government on?
All I can and will say for now is that my life lobbles on and I’m getting by fine. I am thankful for my job. It’s keeping me occupied and the wolves away from my door.
Maybe see you around…